Shared Crossing Stories

I get myself ready for bed and brush my teeth a whole bit and I'm just lying there in bed. It's like, I can't sleep. I can't believe what I've just seen and felt. And the room is so quiet, and I hear, I feel a presence, it's incredible, comes up inside of me and I am going through waves of vapors and clouds, and I just have no sense of time or my body or anything,

I just go. And this is the cloud's part and here is this enormous field and it has no parameters, there are no walls, I get no sense of ending, it's just infinite and they are beings of light and they're wearing, some are in red, some are in blue, some are in yellow, some are in green, some are in orange and they're tall and they're small and they're thin and they're wide and where their faces and heads would be, it's just this beautiful light. And I see a being in front of my eyes going from one side of my vision to the other, just gently pushing the clouds aside.

And every time they would move, this being would push them back again. And then there was Maurice and he was upright, his arms stretched out, he had a white pressed shirt and dark pants. I could see his beard, his hair, his face was not quite clear but I knew it was him. And this welcoming and loving and joy. Wherever I looked, there was just this, I was welcomed, I was so joyful for him.

And then the clouds collapsed and I felt myself going back. And I was there. And I sat up and I was shaking and I was laughing and I was crying. I knew I had seen something amazing. And it was a gift for me.

I just bolted upright, just had this urgent sense, I had to get back now. And so, I threw my clothes back on, raced back over to the hospital, came in, there was no change. She was still, there was a slight change. Her breathing was getting more shallow, more and more rapid short breaths and then pauses and the patterns that a lot of dying people go through when they get close. I said, “Well, I will sit with her if you guys, my sister and brother-in-law want to take a break, because they've been with her. They said, “Yes, we would. We would like to get a bite to eat or take a walk or something.” I said, “Okay, great. You guys take off and I will be here with her.”

And so, I sat in meditation quietly and reached out to her with my mind and my heart, and we connected. I could feel her presence. I knew that she could feel mine, and I just had an outpouring of love, of gratitude for all she had done for me, for the love that she had given me throughout her life, and all that she had done to support me and be there for me. After a few minutes of just kind of being in that state of gratitude. And this sounds corny, but her life flashed before my eyes.

And the way I describe it, it was like watching a movie where you could see the entirety of her life from beginning to end, but it was watching every frame of the movie at the same moment in time. It was not continuous. It was just a vision of her life all the way through childhood, all the way through all the things she went through, coming to Arizona, her family, all that, my father, all that, in the space of an instant, a timeless moment, when I just had this flash of her entire life as if it was watching all the frames of the movie at once. And I was just in awe of that and sitting there with that, just being with her.

And when we were in that space, again, I don't know if time kind of became irrelevant, I don't know how long we were in that moment of being together and me just appreciating her and all she had done in her life. a presence, a very distinct presence of four spirit guides, four individual spirits that came to be with the two of us there. I knew they were benevolent. I had this strong feeling that they were her guides, that they were there to help her cross over and that there was some some relationship between them and her. I did not know what. I did not have any feeling about whether they were her parents or anything. I just had the feeling that they were benevolent. There were four of them, and that they had come. And what I felt from her was trepidation, a feeling of, I do not know what to do. And I said to her, psychically, "these are your guides. It is safe. I am going to be fine. Our family is going to be fine. These are your guides." And it was still for a moment.

She took one deep breath, which she had not taken in an hour or two. When she exhaled, I could just feel her spirit lift off. She exhaled and relaxed and I knew she was gone. The spirits also went with her and so I was there in the room alone. I sat with her for a few minutes just in reverence and gratitude for how easy it had been for her to let go and then called the nurse.

I crawl up on the bed next to her, my sister Ruthie is next to me, my other sisters are kneeling by the bed with my dad, and I'm feeling, I'm up on the bed and I'm feeling her pulse, and I said, no she's, she's still, her heart's still beating, she's still with us. But as I said that, I began to experience it as if, it's really hard to explain, as if I was watching it, but I was also feeling it.

I began to experience her life force, her intelligence, her spirit traveling up the Shishumna, what I know is the Shishumna, the central nerve channel of the spine. Back then I didn't have that language, and I thought well this is odd. It seems like her life force is traveling up her spine. I didn't understand that. But I also felt it from her perspective. And I saw that to her it was a tunnel. And I saw that this area was the light, right? So, there was this light for her. And I saw that it was taking a long time.

I saw that for her it was different. For us it was a few seconds. But for her it was taking its time, and she was actually doing some kind of life review. She was having an experience and then she emerged and as I said it was just a few seconds, and I felt her coming out right here at the crown of the head and going into this beautiful space of light which was in the room but way more expanded and there was a huge welcoming committee. And

I recognized immediately as she exited her body, she recognized her daddy. Now, I never met him. He died when she was young, she was four.
But I recognized their embrace. Like I knew exactly who he was. She has talked about him so many times and I felt, oh, this is her dad. And so, there was that embrace, and then there was her friend Ralphina, who I knew.

She was my best friend's mother, and she had died maybe 10 years earlier of cancer. So, there was Ralphina, and then there were all these family members, some I recognized, some I didn't. And so, she was just in the joy of this being greeted. Meanwhile we're on the bed and I'm like she's gone and we're all crying. We're all just crying and all of a sudden, she turns around and notices us and I'm experiencing this both in my body and from her perspective.

She sees that we're weeping and she sends this pulse of light, this stream of light, and as it penetrated each of us, like it was like this shock, like there was so much joy and so much love, but the tears stopped. And so one after another, we feel this pulse of joy, and we stop crying and look at each other, and we're like, did you feel that? Like she's so happy. And all of us felt it. I was the only one who actually saw.

And so, a few more moments of sort of this love flowing to us from my mom and from her welcoming committee, and then they were gone. And I experienced her just kind of flying. And then we said to each other, oh, she's gone. She's gone to be with our brothers. Our brothers were not there with us.
One of them was in jail. One of them was at the mission training center. He'd left a few days earlier for his mission.

As a very, very young boy I just loved my father but at an older age, we pretty much grew apart, I would say we weren't real close or anything. However, over the years, you know I regularly visited my family and all but we were not, we were just weren't close .... Just two days before he died, he had a physical checkup because he was in hospice care, home hospice care, at that point. And the doctor said you're, you're so good that you could live a couple more years but I'd give you at least six months to live. So it was you know we didn't expect him to live forever but we weren't expecting him to be dead in 48 hours. So ... that morning of the day he died. I was dropped off by my wife at an all day intensive licensing study group for work. And it was super, super rigid, you weren't allowed to bring phones, laptops or anything and this was more or less before cell phones so I didn't have a cell phone, but the only way you could contact out was to get down to the basement of the building and use a payphone, and that was only allowed at the morning and afternoon break and lunch. 

So that's where I was, when we got up that morning. My wife was up before I got up I was expecting to go myself to the meeting. But she said, I just had such a feeling I should go and visit with your mom and dad this morning. So I'll drop you off at the school and I'll go on to out to town. And I had just an impulse to get flowers for my mother and my wife .... And then I attended the class all morning. And when we had a break, I literally ran down to the basement to be first at the phone. And I called on the payphone .. my wife picked up ... her voice was very tremulous, and I asked if the flowers had come. And she said yes, but she said 'John, I think your father just died' .... And I leaned my forehead against, kind of the metal plate if you remember the old pay phones  ... and then, as clear as any anything you'd see in your lifetime, I was looking directly across at a scene. It was kind of like a grassy area with bushes and things, and there were two men standing there, and one of them was my father, and the other one. I didn't really notice or look at much and he was supporting my father by his right arm so they were facing me. He was on my father's right and supporting his arm. And my father is, I really this was the main thing I saw, and I was focused on it because he had this look on his face like nothing I've ever seen. Now he was looking down and he looked weakened, you know confused disoriented like, but it was like he was trying to look so hard inside himself he was looking so deep inside and somebody was like totally focused, like his eyes would be, it's looking inside. And there were, and there was an odd combination of look with that kind of like, like a what's going on here, or maybe even a little bit of, you know, like resistance and he looked a little angry. And it was such a totally different look than I'd ever seen on him that I can remember it to this day. ... and they were both in kind of like long robes, like a grayish linen sort of a material or something. They were standing there, he was, the other one is looking at me, and caught my eye and look great minds and nodded his head, and then kind of turned with my father, and took him towards a little archway like you have a typical garden arch that you run by and silver something was to the left of them in the background with grassy like field behind it. They turned and walked towards that arch and when they got to the arch, the scene was gone.

The vision was just was over, and a few seconds later, it seemed like my wife came back on the phone and said, 'John we think that your father's dead' .... so, I hung up and then I turned and kind of looked apologetically at the other people and I called my sister in law's number, because I didn't have any other alternatives. And somebody grabbed the phone you hear the phone come off thing and gassed out, you know, hello. And it was her sister she had just come back because the day before at the art show it was kind of slow and in the late afternoon she said she kept having this strong feeling that she should go home. … and she drove me, picked me up, drove me out to my parents. ...And when I walked through the door, he was there in his recliner chair right in front of me, and he had one of the long stem roses they put in his hands on his chest. But the look on his face was exactly the look that I saw on the scene when I was at the telephone. 

.... I said to her, it's too bad. We couldn't reach the other kids, because my brother lived about an hour away and some of the others lived a lot farther away they would have come and she said I've already tried them, and I couldn't reach anybody. And at that moment, the back door crashed open, and it was my youngest sister. She had woken up super early in the morning. She worked and lived about, oh gosh 20, 30 miles away. And she just decided she was going to take the day off, and come visit my parents, and she jumped in her car and came and she came crashing in the door, and within the next 15 to 20 minutes, my brother, who worked about an hour away but lived about 100 miles away, came through the door with his wife. She had driven in to take him to lunch, and they just had a strong feeling to come for lunch. These were just common feelings but they were very strong they all followed them. And then my oldest sister, who was about 350 miles away in Iowa, came in about 10 minutes later, she had cancelled her classes for the day, where she taught Nyala, which is something she occasionally did to come visit my parents, but she took off the night before, drove halfway, stayed in a motel and continued the next day. So we had three of my six brothers and sisters, all the ones who are within reasonable distance showed up at the same time I was there. Just, just one after the other. And that's just another amazing, you know, part to this whole story. 

it was, it was like a farewell, you know, definitely.  I was meant to see this and know that he was all right. And I know he believed he was going into another life a better life, but maybe it was so I could tell this you know i don't know I'll just, I can say that it really underscored for me that there is life beyond death. You know that really underscored for me I've had people ask me Do you really believe you're going somewhere when you die and I say absolutely. They say why am I say because of the experiences I've had. 

I wonder how people would be if they started thinking, even if they're like agnostic or skeptical which I always was a skeptical scientific type person. It's like, why aren't we thinking those hey there may be another great adventure out there, because if all we're going to do is conk out and be gone. Why do we even worry about it at all. You know, I mean really, there's not much reason to think about it at all. But, that, you know, that's it. I think it was meant for me to know that he was all right, that he was going to be all right. 

Well, it made me much more confident of things like sometimes I'll have people ask me, do you believe in God and I'll say no I don't believe in God I know there's a God. 

I was calm, I was present, I was really focused that day ... I don't see any way in which this was sort of a mental reaction to something. It was, it was a separate experience. 

There is just so much evidence that there is a whole other level of communication. I just think that people should know that their experience is as real as it seems. It was certainly real for me.